Prompt: comfort sex – "What do you want from me?"
Word Count: ~1.200
Iruka doesn't startle when the knock on his window rouses him from his light doze. He's expecting it; he's been expecting it for the last two days, since he saw Kakashi come back from his mission with a manic look in his uncovered eye and somewhat green around the gills.
The signs were clear and he gave Kakashi a curt nod when their eyes met in the mission room.
He still doesn't understand why he does it, but he's learned not to question either his own desires or Kakashi's needs.
And besides, the sex is good.
He opens the window and lets Kakashi in, taking a long look at him to ascertain his physical condition. With the moon shining through the window Kakashi looks unnaturally pale, his eye glinting in the darkness. But the dark circles under it look less than bruises than they did two days ago, and he doesn’t seem to be about to keel over.
That's good; Iruka doesn't feel like sending him home. Not tonight.
They stand like that for what it feels like an eternity, just staring at each other in silence, until Kakashi slowly removes his gloves and flak vest, his mask following suit.
It's not a gesture Iruka's all that used to, and he still marvels at the features the rest of Konoha are not allowed to see. Kakashi is not perfect, but he's beautiful in Iruka's eyes. His nose is too long, his lips too thin; there is a scar bisecting one of his cheeks--right under the Sharingan--Iruka would have never guessed was that long or deep. His chin is slightly pointy, too narrow for his face, and his neck is too long and thin.
They are not features anyone would need to hide, but they are not the stunningly beautiful ones some people fantasize about nor the hideous ones some others jokingly wish they were.
"Iruka," Kakashi says, taking two short steps toward him and then stopping, his hands falling to his side. "I--"
Iruka takes a step forward then, stopping just short of touching him and pressing his lips eagerly against Kakashi's. It's one of those days, and he fears they will still be like that come dawn if he waits for Kakashi to speak. He's learned to read Kakashi's moods, and he can tell how it's going to be tonight.
They undress in silence, their lips locked the entire time in one of the long, devouring kisses that got Iruka addicted to the other man. He would never admit it, but it's that vulnerability he can feel in him when Kakashi loses himself in his mouth what makes him unable to deny him anything.
Iruka's had this kind of affairs before, and he has never felt anything but desire and physical release in any of them.
Things are different with Kakashi.
They tumble on top of the bed together, their bodies seeking as much contact as they can get, almost as if they were trying to merge. Iruka spreads his legs, letting Kakashi settle between them, grinding their crotches together. He can feel a moan crawling up his throat and he swallows it down, reluctant to let any sound except the friction of their bodies be heard in the room.
Kakashi touches and kisses every inch of skin within his reach, his hands everywhere, his lips hot and hungry on Iruka's body. There will be marks, Iruka knows, and there will be pain. He doesn't care, arching up when teeth close around a nipple, his hands pressing Kakashi's head harder against his chest.
It's been too long since the last time.
He keeps in check every little noise threatening to spill fro his lips, biting back groans and curses when Kakashi's mouth closes around his cock, the task almost too difficult for his diminishing brain functions. But somehow Iruka knows tonight is not a night for words, and he always gives Kakashi what he needs, whether Kakashi asks for it or not.
Maybe that's the reason he keeps coming back.
He doesn’t even feel the first finger breaching him, his arousal too powerful for something like a little sting to register. He feels the second, though, and the burn of the third is hard to miss. He doesn’t mind, the conflicting sensations pulling him back from the brink where Kakashi's taking him. He pulls Kakashi's head up for a kiss, spreading his legs wider to indicate he's ready.
Kakashi takes the hint, kissing him deeply while he slides inside slowly, his breath ragged and hot inside Iruka's mouth. He digs his nails on Kakashi's back, urging him on; he complies, moving in slow, powerful thrusts. They cling to each other as the pace increases, their mouths open against each other and sharing their breath, their bodies crashing against the other with more and more force.
An eternity afterwards, all too soon, Iruka feels his orgasm building, every nerve in his body taut with tension while Kakashi hits that spot inside of him repeatedly. He comes with a muffled groan, his arms tightening around Kakashi's form, pressing him even closer. Kakashi keeps pounding inside of him, his entire body trembling with need, his mouth pressed painfully against Iruka's. He feels more than hears Kakashi's moan, and he swallows it, not allowing the sound to escape the trap of their bodies.
Nothing should break the silence tonight.
When it's over Kakashi slumps on top of him, his head nestled on the crook of his neck. Iruka knows he'll get up soon and leave now he's got what he came for.
He tries not to be hurt by it, but it's getting harder each time. They've been doing this for some time already, and Iruka's getting tired of pretending he's in just for the sex.
He stiffens when Kakashi pulls away, tightening his arms around Kakashi's frame before forcing his body to relax and allowing him to move. Kakashi is not an idiot, though, and he's noticed. He turns to look at him, his expression curious.
He doesn't speak, though the question is clear in his eyes. Iruka shakes his head, a silent apology. They agreed, right at the beginning, to keep the relationship simple and friendly. He shouldn't bring his confused feelings into it now.
Kakashi stares at him hard and then his lips curve into a smile. He relaxes back on the bed and curls around Iruka, who's gone stiff with shock. It's the first time Kakashi has done something like that and he doesn’t know what it means. Doesn’t want to hope what it might mean.
It takes him a long time to relax again, and it's not until he hears Kakashi's breathing even out in the regular patterns of sleep that Iruka heaves a loud sigh of relief. He's still terribly confused and has a thousand questions too ask, but they can wait till morning.
"What do you want from me?" he mumbles as his eyes begin to close, the sweet oblivion of sleep claiming him.
"Everything." It's the whispered reply he doesn't hear.